Therein lies one of the greatest challenges a Garb faces in group environments. It can get rather complicated trying to navigate differing beliefs, values, and priorities while still not losing one’s sense of love and compassion.

I can see how all of this brings us full-circle back to what Harmony Points is all about: Choice!

When individual Garbs operate within groups, they often find it hard to stay the course, to pursue their own objectives.

You have any advice?

Across a lifetime of decisions to be taken, at the core of every Bonding there are two super-important Choices. First, the Garb must choose to respect its own Self. That is, whether to take its Self’s advice to heart.

Self-respect takes on a whole new meaning when I remember what a Self truly is.

Second – and this is the greatest choice of them all – a Garb must be courageous enough to socialize. It’s all about Reconnection, remember? Do you not recall that when ALL set the gameboard for the Game of Life, separations were imposed?

Yeah, I do. You said it was cosmic game of Hide-and-Seek. Souls got separated from each other when they leave Everly. Souls and Garbs are totally detached at childbirth.

Garbs are challenged to overcome natural inclination to distrust others, to engage with other humans, not withstanding.

I know that humans naturally tend to distrust each other. But Souls? They’re the opposite, right? They actually need those loving connections with other Souls to reach their Perfection Quest.

Back to the central theme of Relationships, Garbs must choose whether to practice Agape Love in any meaningful way.

Remember, Fear has the power to extinguish the light of Love. Ultimately, the choice of a lifetime reduces to whether they will succumb to the weight of Fear, or rise above it?

In the end, it really comes down to whether the Garb embraces Inclusivity.

This, then, is the ultimate choice of a Garb’s lifetime. Does the Soul appreciate Diversity as the test it must pass? Or does it fear Diversity, and thus thwart its own Self?

The Scriptures are filled with words that encourage fellowship. I’m thinking, Romans 12:16: “Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.”

Since you opened the door, here are a few other biblical references to the idea that humans ought to reach out to one another.

Romans 12:18 – If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Psalm 133:1 – How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!

Ephesians 4:2 – With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 – Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

We probably need to keep moving, but can I share a verse I learned back in the Catholic Church in Havre de Grace? Hebrews 10:24, I think it sums it all up:

“And let us consider how to spur one another to love and good works. Do not neglect to attend your assemblies, as some do, but rather encourage one another …”

Since we are quoting from the Jewish and Christian bibles, perhaps a contribution from Al Quran 2:178. Look it up.

“Goodness does not consist in turning your face towards East or West. The truly good are those who believe in God and … who give away some of their wealth, however much they cherish it, to their relatives, to orphans, the needy, travelers and beggars and to liberate those in debt and bondage. These are the ones who are true, and it is they who are aware of God.”

You know, we Souls have been sending messages to TempTerra for what seems like an eternity. Sadly, little of it resonates with the typical Garb. In one ear and out the other, as the expression goes.

Can we talk about why humans have such a hard time trusting each other? You heard of the Similarity Attraction Hypothesis?

In Everly, we call it Affinity – the pull people feel toward those who share similar beliefs, values, and backgrounds. Perceived similarity strengthens bonds and fosters trust. And the inverse is just as true.

So, it’s no surprise humans tend to trust only themselves. Even when they trust others, it’s easily withdrawn, since decisions are based on reasoning.

You are correct. Humans assess trust through reasoning, using sensory data.

Which, we noted earlier, is inherently flawed.

Yes. Familiarity is the most significant paradigm, promoting acceptance. What is unfamiliar, conversely, breeds distrust, often manifesting as stereotypes and prejudices.

So, human alliances rely on this Familiarity Paradigm, even in practices like marrying within a group or forming alliances against common adversaries.

Exactly. This Familiarity Paradigm explains bigotry, bias, and nationalism.

I imagine the Soul’s approach to relationships is far simpler—just focused on spreading love, right?

It is straightforward but not simple. As we have noted, to spread love, Souls must engage with others. Divisiveness, something all too common among humans, hinders their mission.

Love requires Altruism and empathy, where one sees and fills another’s void. Which cannot happen if there is distrust and distancing.

The Familiarity Paradigm works on Souls too – just differently. Souls inherently trust one another, seeing all Souls as equally divine, without fear. They understand love begins with trust.

So, Souls seek out those unlike themselves, relishing Diversity? Just the opposite of us humans, who shy away from strangers.

Precisely. Souls embrace Diversity, as it offers endless opportunities to spread love. This view often contrasts with Garbs, who see difference as a threat.

Harmony Point #19: Diversity

Maggie, the main takeaway from the previous discussion is that the Garb-Self Bonding is internally conflicted.

Yeah, in all the ways Garbs and Souls relate to one another, and with themselves.

I am talking about the biggest Confliction of all: Connectedness. Souls, in their purest form, seek complete, unrestricted interaction with one another. They thrive on unity, sharing, and caring about all other Souls.

But with Garbs, it’s different. Most prefer solitude or, when they do connect, they look for connections that serve their own interests. It’s often about what they can gain rather than what they can share.

I get it. Souls want and need everyone to just connect and be open, while our Garb nature keeps saying, “What’s in it for me?”

Precisely. And this conflict is by design. ALL created this spiritual challenge to test and refine each Self’s journey.

This is quite the challenge for any Garb and Soul to work through.

But there is more to it! Not satisfied with the degree of challenge, ALL added another layer, making life even more complex!

How so?

By flooding TempTerra with every possible Variety and Nuance to everything that exists.

Well, throughout Nature, no two things are identical. From galaxies to grains of sand to fingerprints to whale tails — no two things are the same.

It is all about Variety and Nuance. Variety provides endless options. But Nuance … it is all about learning to navigate them wisely. Life in TempTerra would be quite boring if there were no options. Imagine just one spice.

Guess that’s why we say, “Variety is the spice of life?” So, Variety is like all the choices we see around us—different people, ideas, ways of living. And then Nuance… you mean, figuring out which choice actually fits best, even when it’s not obvious. Right?

Since you have related it back to people, I believe you are talking about Diversity.

Diversity? Like, in people with different opinions, backgrounds, religious beliefs, political beliefs, sexual orientations, heritage, and life experience?

Yes. Diversity, as a concept, is currently a politically hot topic. But you see, at its core, Diversity is nothing other than  Variety and Nuance – merely as applied to humans.

How do Souls view Diversity?

Ah, great question. For starters, Diversity only exists in TempTerra.

Wait! I thought each Soul is unique?

In Everly, where Souls originate, while each Soul has a unique essence, they are equal in every other respect, existing in harmony.

So, in Everly, being unique doesn’t separate Souls. But … here in TempTerra, those differences can become real obstacles. They’re exaggerated, almost like they’re trying to keep us apart if we’re not careful.

Most insightful, Maggie. TempTerra’s diversity can indeed act as an obstacle if seen through a limited lens. Here, Garb’s unique traits and material differences are amplified, often misunderstood, and, in some cases, even demonized.

The blessing or curse of Diversity depends entirely on one’s perspective. Can you see this from the context of the Four Tendencies?

Like, if I’m more about Might and Mind, then I might see Diversity as a threat—something that messes with my sense of control. But if I’m in tune with my Heart and Soul, Diversity becomes something beautiful, like the extra flavors that make life interesting.

Precisely. A person centered in Heart and Soul views Diversity as enriching—a source of wisdom, collaboration, and shared strength. It becomes the “spice of life,” as you put it.

The challenge for each Garb is to recognize Diversity as a pathway to growth rather than a point of division.

So, Diversity isn’t just something to “put up with.”

Or … put down!

Yeah, it’s part of God’s design, a challenge we’re meant to work through and even appreciate. It’s like we’re being tested on whether we can see that all these differences actually bring us closer to ALL’s intention.

Indeed. The natural order of ALL’s universe embraces Diversity as a cornerstone, something that aligns with the vastness and complexity of creation. Rejecting it, therefore, would be at odds with the very nature of existence itself.

Let me make this abundantly clear: When Diversity is opposed by a human, it is as if that Garb is standing against the very essence of ALL’s vast creation.

Said that way, it’s like defying God’s Will. Maybe that is why the Bible makes such a big deal about loving strangers.

Harmony Point #20: Societies

I see that the next Harmony Point deals with societies. Didn’t we already discuss groups?

We did. But now we must acknowledge that there are some groups one can leave, and others that are inescapable.

Welcome to the Hotel California!

Ah yes, the Eagles reference. You can check out, but you can never leave. Maggie, you see, there are some groups that Garbs join willingly. And as long as those groups align with the Garb’s personal values, they may find purpose there.

But if a group doesn’t align with who I am, I can either try to influence it from within … or simply leave!

Ah, but Societies are different. Societies are unavoidable.

Well, if by Society you mean a country or a nation, one can possibly emigrate to another country. But, that’s just trading one society for another. Unless I’m shipwrecked on an island, I’m still in a society.

But in Societies, character compatibility is far more difficult.

I can see that. But that begs the question: what is one’s values?

Which is why we need to talk about the idea of Individuality within Societies. Let me ask you: how many entities are there in a loving marriage?

Easy! The two spouses.

There are three. The two spouses, as you noted. But there is the Marriage itself. It is the third entity in the union. It requires as much love and attention as the two individuals themselves.

Interesting.

Now, suppose there is disharmony in that  partnership. Perhaps marriage counseling is called for. But, as is so often the case, the professional assessment is that the individuals have personal issues that are encumbering the marriage.

So, they need to do some personal work first, before trying to fix the marriage itself. But … why did you change subjects?

It is the same issue, just a metaphor. Just exchange group for marriage.

I think I get it. How can one assess their compatibility with the group’s values, if he or she is unclear about their own? Like when someone’s in a relationship, they should know who they are to keep things balanced? It sounds like this applies to groups too.

Yes. Just as a person should have a strong sense of self in a partnership, each individual should hold a healthy self-view when part of a larger community.

This concept is called Individualism. We could spend countless hours discussing it, but let me reduce it two just three attributes: Values, Beliefs, and Principles.

Those terms all sound like synonyms. I imagine there are subtle differences between them?

A Bonding’s core Values are rooted in the Soul. Did you know that? Values are immutable Truths that the Soul knows for certain. Like, Love. When a Bonding values love, it is reflecting the passion of the Soul.

What about Beliefs?

Beliefs formed by the Mind. Let me give you an example. Say, a husband and wife both value harmony in their marriage. They share this Value.

But they have very different Beliefs on how best to achieve harmony. The wife thinks that, when something causes heartburn, it is best to be honest and bring it to a discussion. The husband, however, thinks it is better to internalize the vast majority of irritations, and only confront the most egregious.

I see the difference. What about Principles?

Principles are also a product of the Garb’s Mind. Principles are memorized guideposts that mark the boundaries of Values. Can you see why Values are protected by Principles, but Beliefs are not?

Let me think. Is it because we humans can change our Minds about things? Huh! I just heard myself: Minds!

Indeed. Someone who is open-Minded is willing to consider alternative viewpoints, and that may well alter their Beliefs.

But they wouldn’t be changing their Values. And so, Principles protect Values.

So, now let us return to the discussion about Societies, and how Garbs handle incompatibilities in their outlooks.

So if you’re born into a Society, you’re kind of stuck with its rules, even if they don’t match who you are?

Correct. But there are a few characteristics of Societies that we need to take note of. Attributes of Societies, if you will.

Like what?

Societies operate on mutual dependence, shared values, and a unique Social Contract. That is, people agree to certain rules and authorities in exchange for benefits, such as security, stability, and community services.

This Social Contract creates a structure: values, roles, institutions, and even unwritten norms that give societies their collective character.

It’s like Society is supposed to keep order, since without it people might just act out of fear or selfishness. This Contract keeps everyone in check?

Precisely. It addresses what we call that Familiarity Paradigm we talked about earlier.

Yeah, that humans naturally distrust those they don’t know well.

Societies, through shared customs and accepted rules, can help alleviate this distrust, creating cohesion instead of chaos.